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  • 每日一讀463:不要在晚上找你喜歡的人聊天

    情感文章 admin 5440℃ 0評論

    文 | 白朵朵
    我曾在深夜做過很多錯事兒,比如:

    睡前喝很多水,第二天早上浮腫難消;

    稍微有一點餓就去吃東西,吃飽了又睡不著;

    喝了很多酒,自以為在無人的大街上丑態盡出;

    沒有洗臉刷牙就上床睡覺,時間久了回頭看自己的皮膚和牙齒恨不得哭出來;

    ……

    還有,向喜歡的人唐突地表白,第二天起來看聊天記錄尷尬到無地自容。

    有人和我講,人生每經歷一個人,都是一次成長。

    勛章是課堂,巴掌也是;經驗是成長,教訓也是。

    如果這么講,那么那些深夜里我輾轉反側夜不能寐的時刻,都是給我一記記響亮的巴掌,它們都是教訓,都是我不想再經歷一遍的成長。

    人在晚上的時候總會變得感性和脆弱,那些不切實際的想法總會在心底里瘋狂且放肆的滋生。

    那是在一個寒冷的冬日夜里,我和那個背叛我睡了我閨蜜的前男友,在冬日的夜里邊走邊吃冰激凌。

    其實我們當時的狀態已經是相見即仇人,畢竟他奪走了我對愛情的所有向往和對友誼的所有篤定。他一個人,毀了我們三個人的希望。

    我本來應該很恨他,實際上我也是很恨他沒錯。

    可是那天晚上不知道怎么的我就好脆弱,看著曾經我們拍下的照片,聽過的音樂,聊天的對話,忽然很想他。

    然后手很欠很欠地撥通了那個熟悉的電話。他也沒有一點含蓄,直接接通,像是什么事兒都沒發生過似的和我對話。

    我說,“想出來走走嗎?”這是我們時隔兩年后的第一次對話,還是我打給的他。

    說實話,那天晚上我只是喝了點酒,有點微醺,聽著手機里那些傷感的歌,一時間有些失了自我。

    我們一邊并排走著,一邊煽情的外放著手機里張學友的歌,還一起你一句我一句大聲的唱著。走著走著我不知道想起了些什么,眼淚就下來了,他很配合的用手輕輕地擁住我。

    彼時他已經是我曾經閨蜜的老公,他有家,我在這段關系中充當了當時她的角色。

    那天晚上,我像是賭氣似的和他拍了好幾張合影,發在了自己的朋友圈。后來,還把這些照片發給了曾經的閨蜜,也就是現在他的老婆。

    我還特有心機的錄下我們的對話,故意很大聲的問他究竟后不后悔和我分開,是不是她身上完全沒有我的氣質。

    我當時宿醉的狀態根本不記得發生了些什么,但是好在我還是回家了,萬幸閨蜜把我拉黑了。

    第二天早上,起床看見朋友圈那一張張像是恥辱柱一樣屹立的合影,還有那些凌亂的對話,我心驚膽戰的后怕。

    這都是我在深夜里的做過的傻事兒。

    彼時我特別信“日有所思,夜有所夢”這樣的傻話,也說過“晚上夢到的人,白天一定要去見他”這樣的情話,看過大話西游里至尊寶和小伙計的對話:

    “昨晚你念晶晶的名字98次。”

    “哦,晶晶是我娘子。”

    “還有個叫紫霞的你念了784次。”

    “……”

    “這個紫霞一定欠了你很多的錢。”

    我曾癡迷這種故事化的情節,但后來才懂得:

    永遠不要在深夜里給任何人發任何消息,更不要在深夜里發朋友圈。

    因為這些話,都太感性了,經不起現實一星半點的推敲。它們只是你一時興起的洶涌情緒,和漲潮退潮的海水一樣,總會慢慢的淡下去。

    我們總以為半夜想念的人就是內心真正的惦記,總想著深夜流過的淚就是忘不了的斑跡。

    可其實第二天天一亮,用水洗把臉,我們會忽然發現:

    那個以為這輩子都過不去的坎兒,不知不覺已經過去了;記憶里的那張臉已經模糊的可怕,甚至連輸入法都已經不記得那個名字了。

    你會感嘆,時間過得可真快,真的。

    昨夜把雙眼皮哭成了單眼皮,今早起來,就不知道淚點在哪兒了。

    為什么會這樣?

    因為我們都太習慣把自己短暫的悲傷無限放大,都愿意把暫時的難過夸張化,愿意把無處發泄的感受寄托在一個人身上。

    想著他在和自己說話,于是一下子把心里那些話、那些受過的委屈通通在腦海里幻想著揮發。

    是有多愛多舍不得嗎?

    并不是的!

    我們的眼淚不是因為這個人而流的,他只是情緒抒發的一個借口。

    就像是陳奕迅在《十年》里唱的:

    “直到和你做了多年朋友,才知道你的眼淚,不止為了我而流。也為別人而流。”

    我們的眼淚,真的不如我們想象中的值錢。從頭到尾,我們夜里想的人換了幾撥,從始至終,我們愛過的人一個接一個。

    不要在深夜里,發任何情緒化的朋友圈。否則在第二天早起,你會想殺掉那個昨天矯情到死的自己。

    轉載請注明:每日一讀 » 每日一讀463:不要在晚上找你喜歡的人聊天

    我插過了9關,全世界只有5個人能過20關!!



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