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  • 每日一讀462:成熟,是一個女人最高級的性感

    情感文章 admin 3979℃ 0評論

    文 | 李翊軒言
    昨天,陪朋友去一家外企面試,驚訝地發現,前同事Amy居然是主面試官。Amy下班后,約我出來吃飯,聊了聊近況,她已經是這家公司的副總裁,洛杉磯和新西蘭各有一家分公司。

    回想起五年前,還在一同共事時,她特別自卑,同事也總是欺負她,當時明明有好幾次機會可以晉升,卻總是拒絕,嘴里還說著:我不行的,我做不到,讓別人接手吧!

    有次,公司需要外派一名員工去新西蘭留任副總經理,老板開會詢問大家意見時,眾人還沒表態,老板就望著Amy說了一句:Amy你先出去工作吧!名額有限,不浪費在沒能力沒自信的人身上。

    Amy在眾人嘲諷的目光中逃出了辦公室,一個人躲在廁所里哭了很久。

    之后,她果斷從國企公司里辭職,摔碎了曾小心翼翼捧著的鐵飯碗,考過雅思后,就出國深造了。

    其實,想想也對,她原本就很有才華,只不過一直被周圍的人影響了,從沒堅定過自己的看法,一旦她踏出那一步,成功就在向她招手。

    很多人刻板印象里的成熟,就是學會圓滑處世,懂得揣摩人心,能游刃有余地處理好各種關系,其實這并不是真正意義上的成熟,而是精神的早衰和個性的消亡。

    真正意義上的成熟是,形成獨具特色的個性體系,養成鮮明的人格,能正確地發現真實的自己,從而將自身長處更好地發揮,讓人能深刻記住你的名字。

    自信,是一個女人最強大的武器,不會因為閑言碎語而變成墻頭草隨風搖擺,能堅持己見,如同花木蘭一樣,縱使身為女兒身,依舊不輸給男人分毫。

    當一個女人走向成熟,她也就迎來了勝利,不會費盡心思去打扮來討好誰,臉上不再是胭脂俗粉氣,自己就是最美的女神。玫瑰芬芳,蝴蝶自來。

    上周參加了表妹葉紫的婚禮,一襲白紗加身,頭戴皇冠的葉紫艷壓群芳,一臉洋溢著幸福的笑容,讓眾人羨慕不已。

    回想起三年前,她把閨蜜和男友抓奸在床時,男友連句解釋都沒有,就提了分手。

    之后,她整個人像丟了魂一樣,好似一頭被人斷足的小獸,一到深夜就抱頭痛哭。

    一天幾十個電話,幾十條信息發給他,卻都石沉大海,沒有一絲回應。

    朋友圈里也總是發著傷感輕生的句子:

    你信不信,我會從20層跳下去,然后大聲呼喊你名字。
    曾以為你是我的擺渡人,卻發現不肯上岸的人只有我。
    你知道嗎?你是唯一一個讓我拼盡全力去愛過的人。
    其實割脈也沒多痛,只不過就是手起刀落,血流不止。

    有段時間,甚至還絕食,誰勸都不聽,活生生從120斤瘦到了不足90斤。

    我當時急壞了,直接給了她一巴掌,朝她吼道:你痛不欲生,那就去死呀!為什么還茍延殘喘的活著,因為有人還在愛著你,你沒有資格自暴自棄。

    那天晚上,她抱著我哭了一晚上。

    第二天,她就買了一張去巴黎的機票,入職了那家早就收到offer,卻因為他而一拖再拖沒去上班的服裝設計公司。

    一年后,邂逅了現在的老公,回國發展。

    《李宮俊的詩》里寫道:別說我不成熟,等到我成熟的那一天,我自己自然會從樹上掉下來。

    女人總是要在失去后才能學會成長,總是要在幼稚用盡時才能走向成熟。你沒有辦法逼迫一個人愛你,卻可以選擇去愛另一個人,這個世界上從沒有誰離不開誰,只有誰走不出來,不肯醒悟。

    回想起賈靜雯當初婚變后,面對媒體采訪,頭發散亂,眼睛哭到紅腫,一個十足的喪偶慘婦形象;

    可當她和修杰楷牽手后,兩個人滿懷笑臉地去菜市場買菜,上各類綜藝也透露著幸福的氣息,在42歲的年級里活成了18歲少女。

    成熟的女人,不會在一條死胡同里徘徊,也不會在一棵樹上吊死。

    愛人之前能學會自愛,擁有可以隨時抽身的能力,不會被一段感情綁架和拖累,能活出自己的風采,會選擇最合適自己的配偶。

    我身邊從幼稚變成熟的人很多,除了上面兩位,還有好友莉莉也是。

    以前,莉莉很不理解父母,既然結婚了為什么要選擇分開?離婚后為什么還能像朋友一樣相處?

    她一直都覺得是父親背叛了母親,所以即使母親沒說什么,也依舊還是不能原諒父親,從沒給過父親好臉色看。

    直到有一天,母親出了車禍,急需輸血,醫院血庫里又沒有合適的血型,迫于無奈,她打了電話給父親,當時父親在北京出差,二話沒說,掛了電話就買了當晚的機票,趕回廣州,給母親輸了800cc血。

    還好輸血及時,母親得救了,她笑著告訴父親這個好消息,激動地緊緊抱著他。

    后來兩人在母親病房外第一次交心,原來父母離婚,并不是誰背叛了,兩人結合是雙方父母促成的,婚前彼此并不熟悉對方,沒有什么愛情,而且早在她8歲那年就離婚了,只是為了孩子,一直都沒說破。

    直到后來,父親遇到了現任妻子,才把事情告訴莉莉,但父親任然很照顧她們母女兩人,甚至還幫母親張羅過對象。

    她告訴我:以前總覺得,結了婚就不能離,無論遇到什么困難也要死磕下去,如果不能相守,當初就不要選擇在一起,可現在她不這么覺得了,既然不愛了,放手也是一種幸福,可孩子是無辜的,盡量還是要給她一個完整的家庭。

    其實,成熟和年紀無關,只和經歷有關,沒有身在其中,又何來感同身受一說。你沒做過父母就沒資格指責他們,等到你成為人母的那一刻,才能理解當初父母的選擇。

    艾明雅曾說過:如果說,成熟就是意味著認清現實,拒絕幻想,那么那么多父母心心念念期望的子女個性,終于出現在我的身上。不哀怨,不抱怨,謹記努力微笑比皺眉埋怨的模樣要漂亮。

    一個成熟的子女,能理解父母的不易,不會由著性子去判斷對錯,會設身處地的為父母著想,能認清自己的角色,理解爸爸,照顧好媽媽,做一個孝順兒女。

    年輕時總覺得,分開之后不能做朋友,見面會尷尬。可成熟以后才發現,其實陌生人也能交友,更別說那個曾被你視如珍寶的人,又不是只有愛情才是唯一關系,友情同樣也彌足珍貴,多一個知心朋友也不錯。

    當女人走向成熟,女人味便會愈加濃烈,不再為失戀醉酒如狗,而是會養生潤胃;不再為失敗找任何借口,而是會整頓衣衫東山再起;不再為婚姻破裂而成為怨婦,而是會收拾好心情另尋良人,路從不只有一條,人要往前看。

    轉載請注明:每日一讀 » 每日一讀462:成熟,是一個女人最高級的性感

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